We have posted a bit recently about the people who have disappeared since Shane’s diagnosis.
Unfortunately, there have been many. And if I am honest, it is hard for that not to become a focus sometimes. When silence is loud, you feel it.
But today I want to shift that focus.
Because while many have stepped back, a few others have stepped forward.
And today is about some friends who has shown up almost daily through this reality none of us would ever have chosen.
From the very beginning, Ian and his wife Rosemary have been part of our backbone.
When Mum and Shane are back in Alexandra and not staying with my husband and i (we as well as my sister are all 2.5 hours away). We cannot just pop in for an hour. We cannot respond in minutes.
But Ian can. And he does.
Almost every day that Shane is in Alexandra, Ian comes around to sit with him.
They watch YouTube videos. They watch movies. In the earlier days, they would both fall asleep in the recliners in the lounge. These days, Shane is in his bed. Ian still falls asleep in a recliner. It just happens to be the one sitting at the foot of Shane’s bed.
They “talk” when they need to.
- Shane uses his whiteboard.
- He gives a lot of thumbs up and thumbs down.
- Sometimes communication is slow. Sometimes it is simple.
But the friendship is steady.
Ian has not shied away from MND. He has not been uncomfortable. He has not disappeared.
He has shown up. Quietly. Consistently.
Without fanfare.
Probably more than anyone else we know.
He just sits. And that sitting matters more than he probably realises.
Ian’s friendship has been steadfast and reliable. We appreciate it beyond words.
And while Ian sits with Shane, Rosemary supports Mum.
She has been a shoulder to cry on. Someone who understands that supporting the carer is just as important as supporting the person living with MND.
There is something incredibly powerful about friends who do not need perfect conversation. Who do not need things to be easy. Who do not disappear when life becomes uncomfortable.
They just show up.
In a world where illness can make people retreat, Ian & Rosemary chose to stay.
And that makes all the difference.
